Aside from having two brilliant personal managers, Bronson Page and Sam Page, I have a Talent Manager, Todd Justice ( The Marshack/Zachary Co., Beverly Hills). Justice was kind enough to pass along a letter written by an agent at CAA to their clients which puts the inner-workings/politics of current Film, TV and Commercial areas into laymen’s terms we each can wrap our head around.

The following are snips from the letter and my very subjective and colorful comments:

CAA:  SAG STALEMATE: Since the SAG contract expired on June 30,

2008, there have been few to no STUDIO feature films (this

does not include companies such as Lionsgate and the

Weinstein Company who are not in AMPTP and as such have

completion agreements). Some analysts say there are up to

200 feature films on hold. Around September, we started to

see a mass movement of film actors to TV projects. Many of

my “name” actors have done one-day guest stars

(this is very typical right now), and we are seeing a number

of Guest Star level actors doing CO-STAR roles. Remember

from November of 2007 to March of 2008, due to the

Writer’s Strike, again there were no feature films shot.

So for the film actor, there has only been 4 months of work

in the last 17 months. THE BOTTOM LINE: Due to the lack of

studio feature film production, BOTH film and TV actors are

now competing for a limited number of jobs in the episodic

and pilot environments.

CVD: This makes a lot of sense and I have personally experienced this phenomenon. I had a Guest Star role on Cold Case in October of last year.  I should say, “Fortunately for me…” because I had not even attempted to re-appear in TV or Film until my three managers triple-teamed me.  The part I like about this first snippet is where it says,”Many of my ‘name’  actors have done one-day guest stars….”.  I’m complimented.

CAA: PILOT SEASON: During the Writer’s Strike of 2007-2008,

Studios adapted and used the void to eliminate pilot season

as we know it. Gone are the days of hundreds of pilots. In

fact, this year, there are only 67 pilots to have registered

for production – of which only about 35 have been green

lit for production.

CVD: No Shit, Sherlock. Justice had me all set to go up for a recurring role on The Cleaner and then they go with Debbie Reynolds.  I don’t blame them.  But, I was up for another recurring role in a new series last year, Castle,and I heard that Debbie Reynolds was up for it.  

Okay, already!  So I go up for things that are right for Debbie Reynolds and Jane Curtin…great company. Please get each of these broads a series so that I have a fucking, fighting chance! ( I think the gloves are on.)

CAA: And this year, due again to a sagging economy, studios and

networks believe that by committing named stars to their

projects, they will receive more money from this year’s

up-fronts from ad agencies. They are banking on star power

to leverage better buys at the all important UPFRONTS. So,

stars and pop-stars like Richard Dreyfuss, Chevy Chase,

Brittany Snow, Elle McPherson, Rebecca Romijn, Ashley

Simpson, Scott Caan, Skeet Ulrich, and proven TV talents

like Kelsey Grammar, Eric McCormick, John McGinley, Joel

McHale, Jenna Elfman, Donald Faison, Maura Tierney, Peter

Krauss, Craig T. Nelson, Dax Shepherd, etc…. You do the

math, 37 pilots… top stars being sought… BOTTOM LINE:

the conflagration of the economy and a lack of roles being

cast, means that this pilot season may be even more

competitive than the concurrent regular TV market right now.

So those of you who have gotten auditions for series

regulars… feel great about that!

CVD: Conny Van Dyke, anyone? But, I get it. Supply and demand. I still consider myself lucky. It’s the “considering-myself-patient” part that I am beginning to have a little problem with. Okay…look around, Mama.  You ain’t alone. Moving right along…

CAA: ECONOMIC IMPACT I – THE EROSION OF QUOTES/RATES: There

are really three major impacts to actors during this

economic crunch. First, we are seeing the erosion of quotes.

Due to the availability of so many talented actors, CD’s

and Producers are in the driver’s seat in negotiations.

When they say, “well we got someone else who will do it

for less”, they ain’t kidding. I have spoken to a number

of my peers who have confirmed this erosion of pay for their

actors. In short, right now, quotes are eroding and for

many, the minimum has become the maximum pay.

CVD: Okay, now my hand is in the air, like the four-eyed bitch in 10th grade with all the answers in Mr. Antosiak’s Geometry class! “Cheap? Cheap? I can do cheap and more-than-adequate!” 

CAA: I believe that, even after the SAG stalemate is over, there

is probably not enough money for 50 Studio Feature Films to

be done right out of the gate. BOTTOM LINE: While this will

help us move towards normalcy, it will not be the cash cow

some people think it will be. One side note, is that I

expect that more formulaic projects will be down out the

gate as Studios will be less likely to take significant

risks since most of these

 projects will be financed by both the studio and their

investors. In short, you will see more Iron Mans, Animation,

and SAWs… they are money in the bank when you factor in

ratios, etc.

CVD: Nod to Smart Guy, again.  I can do Saw X;  I can skip a manicure…I can bleed!

CAA: TV and Film money is made, is being hit hard by the

erosion of the US Dollar. So these entities are not able to

recoup the costs they were in better days by the one-time

explosion of the foreign markets. BOTTOM LINE: The economic

conditions are forcing the industry to be as ‘thin’ as

possible.

CVD: I just lost 28 lbs on The Sam Page Zig-Zag Diet…I don’t know how much thinner I’m gonna get. Maybe I should  forget about it and wait tables two blocks up at EATWELL.

CAA: Many strong actors have made enough money on TV/FILM, etc so

that they have not had to do commercials in years. Due to

the last few years and the lack

 of work, many top actors are now back in the commercial

market; thus again, causing a logjam in casting. BOTTOMLINE:

The economic slowdown has caused a dramatic decrease in ad

sales and the lack of work has caused more actors to

re-enter the commercial market.

CVD: I am definitely calling Justice to tell him that I am open to doing colon-cleanse commercials!

CAA:…The good news is that there are some paradigm shifts

occurring that make 2010 -2012 look like it might be one of

the most prolific times in Hollywood history….

CVD: Can you hear me panting?  I could be DEAD by then.

CAA: . However, the consumer can choose the products they

want to see (let’s say you go retail clothing and watch a

Macy’s ad and love the jacket; you can immediately click

on the ad/jacket and go directly to their website where you

can buy it). Also, you earn points by watching the

commercials that you can use towards

 purchases. Furthermore, SONY and others are now selling

TVs that wirelessly connect to your computer, so you can

download TV/FILMS at anytime from your computer (websites

like Hula, Netflix, etc) directly to your TV. In short,

technology is making more platforms which will require more

content than ever. Also, Cablers are all embracing doing

scripted shows, some have up to 5 shows this year… again,

more content is needed and thus MORE ACTORS!

CVD: I feel a wind-up coming…and you know what?  I’m just going to chant for a miracle. (And Kurt Russell is my kind of miracle! Hubba Hubba!)

CAA: BOTTOM LINE: More platforms = more content = more actors!

So as long as SAG/AFTRA can protect your rates and

jurisdictional issues, there will be more good compensated

work than ever in Hollywood by 2010-2012.

CVD: I have always taken “the next best thing” attitude.  That’s what I do.  That’s my story, and I’m sticking with it.  And THAT, My Friend, is NOT just some  more…tales from a broad!

I am twenty-three again, only wiser

I didn’t know it then, but he was everything       

My son, my pulse, my heart, my adviser      

He didn’t change me much, only everything  

Sharing in all things good, life’s appetizer               

Figuring out the bad, but not everything         

We yet make our ways, each realizer          

It seems like yesterday, only everything  waits to celebrate his birthday  

Happy Birthday, Son.

xoxomom

These two men are the most important people in my life and they love each other.

My life is worthwhile because my son has met his soulmate.  

Sam is an anomaly because he realizes, at a very early age, that family is important.  He loves his mother deeply and is moved as deeply because she is going through an especially difficult health issue. Sam extends himself and shows that he is present and impacted. On an especially tough day for all of Sam’s family (which also happened to be Ramona’s 79th birthday), Sam was right where he should have been…with his grandmother.

Sam’s grandmother, Ramona, is a strong and talented woman. Her paintings have taken my breath away and have caused me to stop and look at her work nearly every time I walk by them as they hang upon the wall. I see much of her strength in Sam. I especially loved hearing a singing vmail Sam received from Ramona; she sang, “You Are My Sunshine”. I am moved every time I think about it.

I will not belabor my point nor my feelings.  My son has met his soulmate and his soul-mate’s grandmother is a positive force to be reckoned with, I reckon.  And this, Dear Reader, is NOT just some…tales from a broad.

Nashville, 1973…I think.  There was a big article in the Nashville Banner about a major Hollywood studio coming to film a story about real Country singers and The Grand Ol’ Opry.  Not only that, but it would star Burt Reynolds and he needed a leading lady. This was the stuff that movies were made of…for real.

I was under contract to The Bob Neal Agency. Bob was Elvis’ first manager.

He became “The Agent” to be with if you were Country. God knows he had ‘em all; Dottie West, Barbara Mandrell, Billy “Crash” Craddock, Bobby Bare, Marty Robbins, Don Gibson…and, oh yeah, me.

Bob Neal’s son, “Sonny” Neal was my agent and he and his wife, Joan” became friends of mine and, oh yes…and they endured my then-husband/manager, good ol’ “Whatzhizname”. ( I used to only refer to him as a name much more common. Referring to him by name has always felt like giving him more acknowledgment than he deserves.)   

Anyway, when Hollywood came to Nashville to cast for the movie, “W.W. and the Dixie Dancekings”, the place went a little nuts.  I was 29 and my agency thought that I was too old to play the part of a 19 or 20 year old  ”Dixie”, so they didn’t submit me for the audition.  I submitted myself.

The location of the audtions was printed in the paper, so, on the cold and rainy day of the auditions, I went to a small hotel…Vanderbilt something… to audition…uninvited. My husband, Whatzhizname, my son, Bronson, and the family dog, Princess, and I piled into the car and headed to where I would pull-off one of the best crashes I have ever engineered!

Alone, family waiting in the parking lot, I went in to the front desk and asked which room the auditions were in. I told the guy at the desk that I was Conny Van Dyke and that I was with the Neal Agency. They told me the number. It was just about then that I saw Dottie West walking down the hall. I wondered if she was there for the audition and why the Hell I thought that I had a chance at playing shit in a movie if she was going to be up for it!

 Nevertheless, I went to the room and knocked on the door.  I really don’t remember if I had any idea what I was going to do or say; I don’t recall that I had a script in-mind. Suzi, the wife of the producer, Stanley Canter, opened the door.  I thrust my hand forward and, as she involuntarily shook my hand, I said in my thickest Tennessee accent, “Hi. My name’s Conny Van Dyke and I’m a country singer.  I just wanted to come here personal to thank you all for coming to Nashville to make a real Country music movie with real Country music people from Nashville!” Hand still pumping, she said, “Please come in.” I entered and she said, “Tell me your name again?” Kind of like a question.  I repeated exactly what I had told her, handshaking across the threshold.  She asked if I would excuse her for a moment.  She went to the phone on the little desk in the room and made a call. I remember hearing her say, “Hey, Stan? You have to come up here and meet somebody.”

Shortly thereafter, Stan came to the room.  I repeated the same exact words…one more time.  He asked if I was with anybody…meaning an agent.  I played it even more blonde and even more unassuming and Country when I replied,”No, I ain’t with nobody.  Just came by myself to thank you.”   “Do you sing?”, he asked.  ”Yep.  That’s exactly what I do. But I didn ‘t come here to waste your time or anything.”

Well, the next few days were whirlwind.  Dottie West was told that she could read for the part of Dixie’s mother…I don’t think that went over too well.  The Neal Agency stepped forward and supported me.  I guess since I was one of four chosen to go to Hollywood for a screen test, I really WASN’T too old for the part! (Actually, I was the ONLY local talent to go to Hollywood for the screen test.)

       John Avildsen was to direct…that was an amazing honor.  The guy did Rocky, The Karate Kid, Paper Tiger! (That’s Burt from W.W.in the middle of the photo.)

For the screen test, we were told that we would be singing the Tennessee Waltz on camera; I hate that song.  I made one up while in my Honey Wagon awaiting my turn and, when the time came, I sang that.  (I couldn’t tell you what it was about.)

Sissy Spacek,   (before Carrie  and Coal Miner’s Daughter, but after Prime Cut with Gene Hackman and Lee Marvin),

Candy Clark   (after American Graffiti with Ron Howard) and

Bernadette Peters  (before The Jerk and her Emmy and Golden Globe nominations) all read for Dixie.  For some reason, maybe because I would cost less, Burt chose me. Whatever the reason, I have always been grateful for the opportunity, the experience and the REAL drama that went along with co-starring in a film with Burt Reynolds!  

I had been signed with the William Morris Agency in Los Angeles, so because I was with the Neal Agency and The Halsey Agency in Nashville, somehow W.M. acquired a new branch; they bought Halsey and The Neal Agency became William  Morris Nashville. What an agency percentage split! (Gee, I wonder why they picked the Neal Agency?)

                                                   Ten days after wrapping the filming of “W.W.”, thanks to Burt Reynolds, I began another film in which I co-starred with Joe Don Baker…Framed. But, that would be for another time as one more of those…tales from a broad!

I really didn’t think that I was part of the new millennium because I was too old and not in-touch enough to fit in with the very folk I consider to be my friends. I didn’t have a condition. I was partly wrong.

I asked a very deep question of my son and son-in-law one Sunday afternoon.  If you know me, you know that I don’t do deep questions. I asked them how I would know when I am really being “me”. Being an actress, that seemed like a cogent question. My son’s reply was,”Maybe you should talk to someone about that, Mom.” That meant…see a shrink!  

Since I have been doing a lot of things that I would normally be closed to doing, I said that I would find a doctor and ask him that question.  I found a doctor,Phd, who sees me once a week.  And he actually SEES me once a week, so I asked him that question.

I tell him stuff and he tells me stuff.  He taught me that I DO fit in with all the people I know who have “specialness”.  I am not sure if I am happy or sad.  All my life I was taught to “pull myself up by my boot straps”…and that is what I have done.  No big deal, just get over it! (Like Cher said in Moonstruck.) One foot in front of the other, shine it on, roll over it.  I have always just shaken my head to clear out the cobwebs and have pretty much decided to shelve things that distress me and deal with them later.  My mother and my grandmother taught me how to do this.  They were strong women who took hold of their lives and endured…everything.  They neither took shit nor gave it.  I am not that good; I do both.

I have decided that, since I read an article regarding pharmaceutical companies and doctors, I will continue to “pull myself up by my bootstraps” by not taking more than the occasional Xanax for anxiety (usually associated with work) and continue my “coping skills” which I must have learned from my fore-mothers. 

Do I have a condition? Or, do I have a facet to my personality that the pharmacological neighborhood has made into a “condition” that heretofore was considered “normal”?

I do enjoy the off-loading of some of my baggage and getting some real intelligent feed-back when I am with my doctor. I think that I am learning some things about myself that I did not previously know. However, I previously knew why I have done most of the things that I have done in my life. And BTW, it is ALL me.  I just didn’t know that I am “damaged”. I thought that I was “seasoned”. But that may be just some…tales from a broad.

*You may wish to read the following articles:Drug Companies and Doctors: A Story of Corruption  by Marcia Angell.  January 15, 2009, The New York Review, pp.8

Industry-Sponsored Clinical Research: A Broken System. The Journal of the American Medical Association, September 3, 2008

Shyness: How Normal Behavior Became a Sickness by Christopher Lane. Yale University Press. 263 pp., $27.50; $18.00 (paper)

Our Daily Meds: How the Pharmaceutical Companies Transformed Themselves into Slick Marketing Machines and Hooked the Nation on Prescription Drugs by Melody Petersen.m Sarah Crichton/Farrar, Strauss and Giroux, 432 pp., $26.00

My unique reaction or my quickness of humor may be found in a nano-second during a conversation with my son, but it will be only the mist of me. We are all on a slide to extinction.

I wish that there was an online site where people whom are interested could go to make a donation to the preservation of me but I am not a polar bear, wolf or whale.  Making my water cooler or warmer, cleaning my air, taking away pollutants or making sure that I have a salt-lick will not make me stay longer. There is no changed behavior or habit that will allow my clones to propagate or to live better. When I die, the memory and stories of me will be all that is left.  

I guess I’d better see to it that those ribbons of Conny are bright, honest and true. And if I find myself in a negative situation with a fellow traveler, I best make the moment something I do not mind being shared with others. To continue on as if the moment never happened or as if that person never permeated my space is the unspoken insult and the safest way to be un-quotable.  

Besides that, it takes away the negative energy that courses through me when I decide to reply with a cutting word.  There will be times when my conviction will not allow me to suppress the harshest words; I just have to be certain that it is a battle worth fighting and worth the result.

If you know that your life is a gift and that you are using that gift to its maximum level, you will leave behind the closest thing to an exact copy of yourself; memories and stories that are bright, honest and true.  

There will be no one exactly like you for others to know; that is the gift and that is the magic of the journey to extinction. No matter how old or young you are, 2009 may be the perfect year to begin leaving the footprint which depicts you at your best. And that, Dear Ones, is not just…some tales from a broad.

pleasedontdivorce@couragecampaign.org

The thing about the party is that it was a really great opportunity to meet the people who are so much a part of our individual lives.  I will not go on and on about how great the evening was…well,maybe just a tad.

 It was great to finally put a face to the name of those we had heard of from each other.  Sam put it so succinctly this morning while he was whipping up scrambled eggs with cheese and a huge batch of fried potatoes and onions; “It was such a great time because it gave us our first real feeling of being a family core, in our home, with the friends who came to share it.” Sam has a way of paring down things to their basic truth. He also has a great way of using some of the leftovers from the party!

Although we each had our own segment of the inviteds, it was rewarding to see the melding of a lot of folks from a lot of different places in our individual lives. I have always thought myself lucky to work with the people at Click and this was my chance to kind of show them off to my son and to my son-in-law. It was also my chance to introduce my friends to my family.  It was a genuine positive experience for the three of us; one I am sure we will repeat. It means so much when people carve out the time to  share themselves.

Churchill and Max loved meeting so many people and Burbank the Cat evn stayed downstais for the evening.  However, I couldn’t catch up with her for a photo-opp; not even this morning!

Last night was a great night with great food, a good fire and the best people you’ll find anywhere. I thank them so much for coming and for making this Holiday Season the richest one in memory. Believe me, that’s not just some more…tales from a broad.

I was not really sure

What I would be doing

or what I would endure

There was much to do

And three of us to do it

All I knew for real, for sure

Was that we three would get through it.

The house was cleaned

We found the decorations

We’d planned the food and timeline

Stocked some fab libations

Beneath all this, life was real

It had the warmth

And had the feel

We talked and laughed

And even cried

We came closer together                                    

And hadn’t even tried

We changed our gear

To forge ahead

Any negative became

Positive instead

It’s going to be

a different year

We have a grip

The road is clear

I’ll share in them

They’ll share in me                      

What a better year

It’s bound to be

We had the love

All along

But, now together,

It’s three-times strong

Another thing that I have to say                          

Is life is better than even yesterday

Nothing to fear

No great confusion

Abundance is ours

In splendid profusion

Now I know

We are three to do it

And whatever comes

We three will get through it.

Happy Chanuka,                                  

Happy Kwanza,

Merry Christmas,

It’s such a shonda

That every family everywhere

Cannot know the joy that we share

Every father, mother, sister, brother

Son and daughter and any other

Hug the ones so close to you                          

That’s the important thing to do

Before you know it,

And in not very long,

You’ll find it impossible

To not get along.

You’ll discover the hearts

That beat like yours

The tears are the same

The games and the chores

With that said

All that’s left to say                                    

Is make each day 

Your Holiday.

I send my love to each and every person I know and don’t know…

and that’s not just some more…tales from a broad!

XOXO CVD

                                                          (That’s my room at the top right.)

I have all my clothes,art, pictures, books, shoes and cat.  Hmmmm.  What am I missing? Oh, yeah, my mind. I had no idea that it would take longer than a couple of weekends to collect the splinters of me and move them in. 

That’s okay…Bronson and Sam are pretty patient guys.  The understanding helps, too. (Did I mention that they are loving and caring? Sounds like a plug for Boy Scouts.)

I look forward to our Holiday Gathering coming up, when we will have a lot of our favorite folk here to toast the Holidays. 

Now, all I have to do is stop “visiting” and start “being”. It is a little more complicated than I anticipated.  I just have to stop hissing and pissing on areas to mark my territory.  OMFG! I sound like a lady with 50 cats! (I only have Burbank the Cat…and now, her step-brothers, Churchill and Max.)

I planned to have a few more pictures included in this, but I can’t find my camera.  Oh well, I’ll just have to include them in some other…tales from abroad.